This is what it means...

So to tell you how the last few days have been here in Cbba... there must be a time of confession. Not necessarily a confession that I am proud to disclose, but one that must be shared none the less. The last year has been a hard year for me... now I know that is not a newsflash to those who know me, or have followed the going ons in the life of the Bulls. But what is not always noticeable is that I had not truly enjoyed mommyhood like I had hoped to. Chalk it up to PPD, culture shock (to mommyland and Bolivia), or whatever else you might think of. But at the same time please don't misunderstand, I love my son, have from the day we found out he would one day enter our world. But have struggled so as a new mommy with confidence. Not sure if other new mommies struggle the same way, but I truly felt inadequate. That doesn't even begin to describe it though, there was an anxiety in my heart about being a mommy. If I had to take Nathan somewhere by myself, or go to church by myself (without Gary) there was an anxiety deep inside me about being enough. Not knowing if I could do it on my own. That yuckiness really spilled over into our marriage, into how I interacted with my husband and my son. Again, please know that my son has not been mistreated :) He has been loved and nurtured from the day he entered this world. But this last week he has been enjoyed by this mommy in a way that I never knew I could. I have loved being a mommy this week. From the crying to the laughing, I have loved every minute. I could tell you different reasons for the change, but there is only one that I know without a shadow of a doubt has come into my life like a fresh breeze, and that is the presence of my Lord. I have prayed and prayed over the last few weeks in a different way than I have since, well... truly since the miscarriage, and my life, my spirit, and my soul can attest to the difference. I thank God for His Spirit that He left to comfort, guide and impart His wisdom until His Son returns. That Spirit has been a new life in me this past week and I am reborn. So to all of those who have us in their daily prayers... know that no matter what you have been praying for us, your prayers have been answered, and this mommy is "disfrutando" (enjoying - savoring) my roles in life. It makes my heart ache a little that it has taken this long, but it is all in the Lord's timing, and His timing is ALWAYS perfect. Praise the Lord oh my soul!

Answered Prayers

Just wanted to give everyone a quick update on the crazy nose situation going on down here :) We went to the doctor on Thursday to get results of the biopsy and x-rays taken on Monday... and wouldn't you know... we hit a snag. I was sooooo missing the medical system in the states as the secretary looked at me like I was crazy when I asked if they had the results to my tests in the office. You see... and I should have remembered this from other team members experiences, but you live and learn... here you have to go and pick up your own x-rays / test results / whatever else they did... and actually take it to the doctor's office yourself. Now I'm used to the system in the states where you practically have to give them your first born child and sign release documents in your own blood to receive medical records. But here... you just walk up... and request your results... no i.d... no first born... no blood... no nothing. So Friday I went to pick up the results (because after the doh moment in the doctor's office... the secretary had called ahead to the hospital to check on the results and of course they weren't done). Then Friday afternoon was able to touch base with the Doc. She said that all came back clear... no malignancy Praise our God and now we are just going to go forward from here with a CT of the head (I'm telling you she's worried I don't have a brain :) So all of that to say... thank you so much for all your prayers!!! After much prayers, and much chocolate ice cream (comfort foods!) we are alot more relaxed down here :)

And answered prayer #2... drumroll please... we found a house. We'll be moving in.. Lord willing on the first of September and are really excited. With every motorcycle / car alarm / bark of the dog that lives above us I thank God that He has provided us with a home, that will give us a little more space and tranquility. There is an attic bedroom with tons of room AND... it's own bathroom... PERFECT for visitors... so seriously come on down. The Bull hotel will be up and running with it's first guests... my folks and sister around the tenth of September :) And we'd love to have more in the months to come. God bless you all!

Installment #....

You know you're in Cochabamba when.....

A motorcycle is considered a family vehicle :)

(courtesy of Gary Bull)

Double the pleasure... Double the fun

So two new funny stories from the Bull bunch. Being from the state of Arkansas brings a whole new set of fun facts, & jokes. One being that all little boys, okay men too, have mullets (hope I spelled that right). You know the almost ponytail in the back... a little scary to invision I admit, but needed to tell the story. So Nathan is folically challenged so far (of which he comes by naturally :) but not in one part of his head.... the back. So recently Gary & I had been noticing that the longer the hair got... the more it truly resembled Nathan's Arkansas roots of a mullet. So his daddy decided one night before bathtime that we would take care of the problem & with one fell swoop of the scissors, took care of that :) So picture this... I'm sitting in front of Nathan to distract him while his daddy sits behind him with the scissors, so I have yet to see my husband's handy work... & I say to him... how does it look? He says "okay" I ask "is it even?" & he says to me, in a serious voice and honestly "you wanted it even?" okay so after my heart started beating again, I laughed like I haven't laughed in a long time. I said to Gary "no I thought a Charlie Brown yellow t-shirt zig-zag might be a nice look for Nathan" in between laughs. So in conclusion, the hair turned out fine, it is a little uneven, but we can thank the Wallace - kind of curl - for that. And we will be attending a barbershop from here on out :)

Second story, last week I went to an ENT here. I've been having some trouble with a mass growing in my nose (probably too much information :), & was getting a little concerned. So she suggests that we do a biopsy and an x-ray (to make sure the gringo has a brain right? :) So today Gary & I trek across town to a hospital where Dra. Choque works for the biopsy. We get there and wait because you wait for doctors no matter the country or culture, I promise that, & then she calls me in. So I sit down in this crazy chair & then 4 med students circle around me. Now I'm not claustrophobic, but really, this lady's going to cut something out of my nose, do you all really have to stand here & watch :) Then she hands some gauze to one of the students to catch the blood that will run from my nose (mind you there are four right? Two male & two female. Now one male looked very gentle/sensitive, would've been okay with him holding the gauze, the two females looked very capable, but no... she hands the gauze to a male who looks like he should be an offensive lineman for the Cowboys, not exactly surgeon hands if you know what i mean) Then she proceeds to tell me to lean my head back (which will be the first of about 50 million times that she will say this to me in 10 minutes) & as blood is running the three capable students are yelling at the linebacker to use the gauze in his hand :) oh, you should have seen my face. but it gets better.... after she gets the samples that she needs she packed what seemed like half a Northeast Arkansas field of cotton up my nose, with drops and proceeds to tell me that I can't take it out for 3 days. 3 DAYS???? and then takes cotton gauze, and tapes it to the outside of my nose. So wouldn't you like to see pictures of this. Gary keeps telling everyone that I gave him lip just one too many times :) And you can imagine the challenge in trying to keep an 11 month old (who is in the picking stage) from touching... okay ripping the tape from my face. So... we shall see how the next few days go. They can't be any crazier than today... let's hope :) Just thought I'd share a few funny stories from the life of a Bolivian mommy :) Hope you got the laugh that we did!!

Ready or not....Here I Come!!!!

Calling all Prayer Warriors

Friends and Family... The Bulls have a prayer request for all. We have recently made the decision to start looking for a house to rent here in Cochabamba. We decided that we would love to live close to our teammates the Marcums who live about 10 to 15 minutes from the center of downtown, where we currently live. It is not that we have not been happy with our apartment thus far, just that we are ready to have a little more space, for our family and future visitors :) and are ready to live in a place without someone above us (like the crazy dog living above us now :) So we began looking and found what I think (knowing that this may not be God's perfect plan) is the perfect house for us. It will meet all our family needs, is within budget, and is just 3 blocks from the Marcum family. So long story short, we were ready to sign on the dotted line until the real estate agent checked with the owner and he told her he had decided to sell rather than rent (for reasons longer than the Blog website will allow me to post :) But he has said that in two weeks, if the house has not sold, he will be open to renting to us. So right now... my first prayer is that God will place exactly where He wants us, but as God tells us in scripture that we may ask Him for the desires of our hearts, I am praying that this house will not sell in the next two weeks :) and that the owner will be open to renting. Please pray with us that God will place exactly where He wants us in this great city. Thank you for your prayers, they are our most treasured gifts from across the miles :) God bless you all.

The world as we knew it

Well, mark it down, our little boy's mobile :) Sunday night, my son finally decided it was time to try out his legs, and hasn't stopped since. We're slowly but surely moving everything in our house higher and higher to avoid the new height at which he can reach everything!! I'm vaguely remembering a very memorable Christmas tree at the Bewley's one year :) on which there were no ornaments on the bottom three feet or so :) I'm feeling their pain now. But he really is having fun with his new found independence and we are loving watching him grow. I am working on learning how to put video feed on the blog, so hopefully in a few days we'll have some real live footage of the little man in action. Just wanted to pass along the fun news :)