So... as Gary sat with me during Nathan's bathtime and I recounted our day, I was sad to have to say that Nathan got two "spankings" today. Usually that is not the case... but oh the attitude that emerged today... well, let me paint the picture...
Nathan woke up super early this morning and so was ready for a nap as I hit the whining, fussing wall of mommy toleration. So as we're rocking and he's finishing his milk I make the move to the shoulder for burping maneuver and he won't put his head on my shoulder. Now usually this is a short little "game" that he and I play, him lifting his head up to smile at me and me saying "lay down Nathan" and usually he minds. But today he decided to use his favorite word instead... NO! This word works wonders for him when he's out back with Lucy our puppy and she's jumping on him, or playing to rough. He walks his little squatty body around the back yard swishing his finger at her and saying "No, No, No!" Super cute, today... NOT so super cute! So we started off the morning with a spanking for telling mommy NO which is totally not allowed!
What you have to know at this point is that Nathan is super funny when he realizes he's in trouble. I guess I have the mommy... "You did not just do that" look down pretty well, because when he sees it cross my face, he grins really big and starts this sweet little nervous laugh, kind of a "if I smile real big and giggle real cute, maybe it'll get me out of trouble" act. So needless to say, disciplining gets harder and harder by the minute for me as I try to be serious amidst the cuteness.
Nathan's second "spanking" (and by spanking I mean small swat on the leg, so no worries that we've taken to seriously spanking a less than two year old) came at the point in the day where he thought it would be a good idea to spank mommy after she told him no for something or other. Yeah... well you can just imagine how well that went over with the mommy. Enter "spanking" number two. But again, with the big smile and little nervous giggle.
I am only imagining that this will get harder and harder to do as the years go on and his personality/sense of humor continue to develop. Lord help me!!!... to be the mommy that I need to be for Nathan, and the strength to know when I need to leave the room for a second, not out of anger... but to hide my smile and laughter at how precious he really is, when he's supposed to be in big trouble :) As usual, I welcome suggestions from fellow mommies in toddler, or post toddler land! :) May God bless us all!
Oh how easy it is to CRACK UP at this, when it isn't my kid! If you managed to keep a straight face when Nathan spanked you, after the shock wore off, then you are my hero. Love you!
ReplyDeleteI just had the best laugh in a long time! Thanks Nathan!! :) I get through some days and there are others that I feel like I am being tested every millisecond of the day. But, if you keep up with it and find a way to be consistent, you will not have to discipline too often as he gets older- he just might tell himself no! Thinking of (and praying for) you as you hit the "toddler" years
ReplyDeleteI don't have any advice since I have NOOO experience, but here's a story you might have heard from when Garrett was 4. We were at Sea World, standing in line for a ride. Scott, you know, is over 6 feet tall and when we are standing up Amy and I just would tower over a 4 year old. So the adults were talking and Garrett got tired of this and whacked the woman's behind in front of us in line! All 3 of us just died, I walked away hearing Scott sputtering trying to apologize to this woman as he was trying desperately to not crack up! I don't know how not to laugh when they do things like this. Thank God the woman wasn't upset!
ReplyDeleteOh sweet friend, I would of died laughing since that is what Aunts do-they try to ignore that kind of behavior.
ReplyDeleteBut here are two verses I have enjoyed chewing on for furture parenting days:
Proverbs 23:13 and Proverbs 13:24 the first one made me laugh out loud
Oh my, it has begun!! We are in the thick of it now and it just takes considerable patience. Many times I leave the room to cool off before handling the discipline. One thing I remind myself of is this is just a phase and I must maintain authority for her sake. Praying is the best route, especially for wisdom as a mommy, something I now do daily!
ReplyDeleteHey Laura,
ReplyDeleteI as soon as I finished reading your post I went in the other room and told Tate he was not allowed to grow older than 2 months!
My biggest fear is that he is somehow able to get me to crack up - if that happens then that boy won't have a disciplined bone in his body!
W
laura...i am right with you, sister! as you know caden and nathan seem to be following each other in developments and you can guess what we're dealing with right now! has nathan tried the squealing to get your attention yet? that's our big thing...yea, try ignoring that one when he's doing it because he knows it gets any one and everyone's attention.
ReplyDelete--april
No, no not from the most wonderful grandchild in the world! ha ha. Love, Nana
ReplyDeleteHey Laura!
ReplyDeleteMan, oh, man it can be hard when our little ones start to assert their independence. But they do say it's a really, really good thing when they start to do this. It means a child is developing beautifully. If Nathan minded you in everything you asked, I'd think something was seriously wrong with that scenario. That being said, let me pass along a few techniques/thoughts from our camp. We're only about 1 1/2 years ahead in parenting, so take this for what you will:
Timeouts have really been effective in our home. I think I started with Ellie between 1 and 1 1/2-years-old. The general rule is one minute for every year of age. So right now Ellie spends two minutes in timeout when she goes there. Timeout is always in the same place, and when we bring her there, we calmly tell her why she is sitting there, and for how long. After that time passes, we come back to her and recap the scenario. If needed, we ask her to apologize, then hugs and kisses with the kid (so they know no ill-will is kept), and move on with life.
I've done the same thing with Ellie that you've done with Nathan-- a quick spank. But I've found that it wasn't very effective with Ellie. I think it had the potential to send the wrong message-- Ellie would hit back, and we had a hard time justifying why our hit was "right" but her hit was "wrong."
Also, I've found that a child asserting her "No" can be a good thing. She needs to have a mind of her own, but one that is lovingly guided by her family. Discipline is definitely a form of love, and in no way do I think a child should be indulged in everything they want. However, when Ellie does say "No" to me, I step back for just a second and see if her "no" is an option in the scenario. Sometimes it is, and if she doesn't want to do what I've just asked it's not a big deal. And sometimes it isn't an option, and I then tell her that she needs to do it, or there will be a consequence.
So take from that what you want. I think you're doing a wonderful job as a parent. I have SO appreciated your candidness and honesty. It's been a blessing to read your thoughts and God's revelations to you. It's definitely made me feel like I have a kindred-spirit parent out there.
Keep up the great work! You're doing awesome.